I have one life lesson to share with you: Blenders are from the devil.
But sometimes they’re the only thing that’ll get the job done. A necessary evil, I guess you could say.
When I was 16, I got into a nasty fight with a blender and it won. Whilst I attempted to clean the interior of said villainous kitchen appliance, it schemed to jump out of my grasp, dashing itself into a trillion-million pieces – two large chunks of which decided to have a sleepover inside my hand. 14 stitches later, I have some pretty legit scars.
Where were we, oh yes! Blenders! Sorry, lost my train of thought thinking about all of that blood. Everywhere. All over the place.
ALMOND FLOUR. It’s expensive. Like, drain your wallet expensive. Why not just make your own? Makes sense to me. Here’s what you’ll need:
- A blender – Gawd *$@#*(#$##@$ it.
- Almonds - I suggest blanched almond slivers.
Here we have some of those almond slivers, as well as some sliced raw almonds.
Having had an emotionally scarred past with blenders has instilled in me a no-mercy attitude when it comes to using them. If they want to fight dirty, I’m going to fight dirty too. Hence.
STEP ONE: Blend your almonds into oblivion by whatever means necessary. I suggest using the talents of gravity to aid you in this process. Give that blender a good taste of its own spinning medicine.
STEP TWO: There’s only one step.
Here’s what your flour may (or may not) look like. It really depends on if you did a sucky job. Or if your blender hates you like mine does. If it looks and feels about the consistency of powdered parmesan cheese, then you’ve probably done a fairly decent job. Go you!
Any suggestions? Do you hate blenders as much as I do?